My Cussing Prelude Oh WOW! This page is nothing like those poop-skudoop posts, where u have to break your thumb and keep clicking NEXT! just to view that 1 photo per page.

All in one here. why??  because Its a creative blog {Angry face: blue-blistering-barnacles ,cuss of Captain Haddock}.

..and not some effing infomercial disguised as creativity LOL


I have tried humor with a bunch of topics. Let’s see if it makes you laugh a bit or encourages you to even share this among your friends with a  new ‘nudge-nudge, wink-wink ‘ fillip.


Just Ten  Memes to start with. Here we go-



#1 For all those stalkers , who never talk to you on chat-screens or even give heed to your presence on the internet. They just keep  around to stalk your DP’s,  cover photo’s , Selfies i.e. by either latching enviously  & hoping that you turn either fat and dull one day or keep their click-pads ready ,to save your pictures in their secret vaults. Here’s how you may take them ‘bulls by horn’. Go ahead and make this your DP for a day!



#2  Remember those LAN gaming days ! Enthused with endless hours of gaming. This is what could have actually happened to you if you din’t have a Monday to attend some work. This picture below is what happened to a boy in USA who kept playing for a month. It’s true, am not joking!


counter strike meme


#3 If we could actually turn so smart with smartphones and get globally competent with internet. If i were the PM,I would do a Harlem Shake ;the moment i could finish all other problems and focus singularly on digitalising my nation. But I can only ..Sigh! & Face-palm!

digital india



#4  Retrospective  or Retrograde? – By the end of 20th century everything shrunk. Even the stages of young life, childhood went missing on Internet Error #404 (not found )and boyhood was leaping strides into adulthood. It’s like an Iron quenched too fast too bad. If i could tell these kids everything about 90’s. It was childhood’s final stand against an invading 21st century!


Finding childhood


#5  You can always suffer with the delightful company of these friends! They will calorie count everything, keep IOS calorie counting applications ready in their mobiles. They will drink green tea like their life depends on it, refuse sweets like its poison, disown oily food & try to balance everything like  christian bale playing American Psycho.

Except! they will always keep sedentary lifestyles, keep up with weekend alcoholism & party glutton. They will never get up early to run or hit the gym regularly.By the end of  year! their energy balance sheet is in surplus & insolvent,their health knowledge database is still restricted to tips & magazine fads with commercially biased monologues and their new year resolution is back to square one. Hey! you still look the same.

Kermit The Snitch



#6 The Lollers – I just hate them. Those Mo-F#%^&R@. They LOL at everything,while texting and vocally as well! Tell them your best joke and you will never know if what you said is even funny! Aren’t they too laid back and full of themselves?

This Meme-way should be meted out to them,isn’t it?




#7 The Metabolic Beings – On one hand, i crave for things i just can’t eat because i get fat. Then there are  these people, who can eat just about everything in wholesome amount. They either make fun of me or crib about their falling weight. I rather doubt if they will ever gain!





#8  The world is literally consuming the pathos in Africa and poverty of other nations. It has perverted so much that recently a new term was coined to flak all these self-congratulatory NGO enthusiasts . These critics asked them to stop making a ‘poverty Porn’ out of African culture and others.

These  people want to pose with them and show the world what they are upto. They start by stealing a barrel of their Nature’s juice  and payback through a tiny dripper. It will never suffice in that manner. So ,stop trying to help or Help but don’t show to the world that your trying! Let the smart african kid tell you- ‘In your face’



#9 The Dog Awwer Girl- This is to remind the Dog awwing girls on social network that the real dogs are laughing on them.The only way to find out is to find out!

Check out what the Hustling Husky has to say-

Pun Dog


#10 The Cat Connection – When the digital world shall be doomed  then cat videos will revive it. No matter what you do on social network or any mass broadcasting center. If you know this golden rule you can always bank on it ,  even in your most desperate times. When nothing sells, cat memes & cat videos Shall! Touche’

Million dollar question – If required, would a cat really care for you?

sad cat


Meme Art - #1 Miscellaneous Humor

Meme Art – #1 Miscellaneous Humor


Vishu Mishra


A New Kindle E-book – Captain Jack’s : Pirate Training for Arms

Captain Jack's - Pirate Training for Arms

Captain Jack’s – Pirate Training for Arms

My new E-book is released on Amazon Kindle on Aug,24,2015. Check it out.

Genre : Fitness,Health & Resistance Training


Short Description : A Quick-read, highly effective & easy to use fitness program for new gymers. Get hooked to a drug-free, natural & expedient growth on your arms training.



Long Description :

Consider this book like a recipe manual. You will have everything in here, all you need for it to work! – Health factors, social factors, sports psychology and real-time training principles. It is however all present in the right proportions i.e. just what will make a perfect dish! A quick reading of this and you’re ready.


One always feels empowered will genuine knowledge and information. It makes you will power oscillate to higher energy levels. All the elements and people who will shroud this simple doctrine will fade away.

I have encapsulated all I know from learning, training and empirical experiences of past six years of my ‘Gym-Time’. It is for a philanthropic reason, I simply believe that everyone has the right to – good health, good youth, good looks, good sport and drug-free approach towards better lifestyle. You can also gift this quick-guide to anyone who is starting out in the fitness industry. Small gesture of this book will save anyone a lot of money – fiend coaches’ fee, supplement scam, anabolic abuse and all non-productive deviations in their workout timeline.

It is important to create health along with self-esteem and that can only come with a right, ethical approach toward training. I wish you all the best in your endeavors.



Best  Regards , Thank you.

Vishu Mishra





No smoking pledge- 1st anniversary :chapter 2 – relapse & recovery


chapter 2- relapse & recovery

the storyteller

the storyteller

I wrote a poem an year back, I would like to quote few lines before I begin


“blurring smoke blackened lips,
life to ashes of finger tips.
reflected the glimpse of my midnight lamp.
the lamp black that paints my mortal,
the sinful smoke that torns my mettle.
reflected the glimpse of my midnight lamp.
in seventh circle of smoke,i choke.i settle.”

– My midnight lamp



December, 2010

Around 8 o’ clock in the morning.

As he would pace around the narrow gallery in unsettled mood and restlessness, I was second to wake up in the room and moved outdoor for a breath of fresh air, only to find him standing mid- way and leaping out of the balcony with a purpose to get a sight of the nearby confectionery store. He would pace around from one end to another and do this periodically after every five minutes. While I would wander around with an indefinite purpose, stretching myself, moving in and out of the room,drinking water from the nearby cooler that lay just adjacent to the building staircase and just three big steps from our room. he would still pace faster and faster and now murmuring something to himself and meanwhile leaping off the balcony to catch a sight of that shop.

okay. It got open.. (he said), I will be back in a minute.

As I stood there for another minute, he returned with a pack of smokes and one of them got lit at that moment, the very reason he was pacing for half an hour. This was one odd day when he had fallen short of his morning quota and therefore had trouble in getting his day to a start.

After few drags in, he seemed much more calm and composed, much more familiar as I knew him,and even before I could jump to my obvious question, he was far more perspicacious to sense my curiosity and address the issue with an exhaustive approach.  he begins to explain

The urge to smoke goes beyond the point of tolerance after a time in your sin-span as a smoker, especially in the early morning and before going to sleep. its nothing unusual to a regular smoker and nothing not known of, but the most interesting thing is that most people miss the catch, it’s the point where the control is shifted from yourself to your body’s’ essential need, goes mostly un-noticed by most, even myself.

There  is a thing called relapse, every addictive drug or abuseable substance has a specific time limit to relapse, depending on the average strata of abusers and its degree of abuse potential. so if your under recovery and quitting it, the process at most times become so dysfunctional that the drug seems a part of self- medication and you come back to it. Its much stronger and much less for chemical – based substance abuse  for e.g. if you do it with heroine or coke, you are bound to be addicted by the third time, I personally don’t support chemicals. further,the relapse time goes on increasing with the simpler  and natural substances, and of course there are other factors such as ease of availability, the cost, the social proof, that accounts for the background potential, simplest example could be tea or coffee which addicts most people in the world but however, a smoker is most likely to die of cancer owing to its composition and wood-ash adulteration and several other chemical compounds that are into it owing to its manufacturing process, a tea or a coffee drinker may not.its much better to get tobacco and rolling paper and make your own sticks but its time consuming.however, it can be considered as a good option as manipal has lot of fake cigarettes, its  difficult to find genuine stuff …

While I stood there giving my utmost attention to his monologue and his inflow explanation of things,finely blended with his own experiences unlike the sub-standard smokes he carried with himself & found the quality suffering more chronically than his morning rush.I stood there and wondered whether knowledge is preventive or simply a pseudo platform that is apparent enough to allow even the most aware minds (such as himself), to comfortably stand and do acrobats on the most precarious ends of choices towards mysteriously paced inevitability. However the pace of periliousness is set by you (as he was trying to tell ),and that’s another irony and freedom of control on addiction.while i could barely end up registering these overwhelming thoughts on self- control in the meanwhile, Anurag would further go on explaining..

time is an important factor in determining recovery, I am also trying to quit and once I go back home, It will be much easier, I have it all planned. I need to quit smoking before twenty five,then within three years my lungs will be clean and by five It would be like as if I never smoked, you should also remember that and try to quit by twenty five.This is one thing that needs to be done after college.. however, if your quitting after that, say at age of 27 or 30, It would take about ten years for same process and (he stressed) fifteen years to that if leaving it at thirty five, that’s a very crucial stats ( he is delighted to narrate).

however, recovery has time oriented function and so is relapse, it’s not easy for a serious druggy (drug addict) to get back to the same state in a spike, it’s a gradual slope up, just like down. Once I smoked two packs of twenty in a few hours at the airport, to get back to the buzz and high,even when I am not a drug addict. Others I know, have done 80 sticks and it depends on what’s your chart, it varies from person to person. College is a place where you take things in your own hands and do actions that decide what you’re going to be, it’s the mentorship from boyhood to manhood, that’s why college is so important. hence, lectures such as these will be helpful (he smiles with a wit ), its more important to understand and take knowledge of things than stay protected and turn your eyes away from them, anyone can do that.So smoke all you want but try to quit by twenty five.. its part of a plan “ (he offers me a smoke , i took it with pleasure and goes out waving to his friend who was waiting across the road on his motorbike).”


 A good working definition of Relapse -The relapse process is a lot like knocking over a line of dominoes.  The first domino hits the second, which hits the third, and soon a progressive chain reaction, has started. The sequence of problems that lead from stable sobriety to relapse are similar to those dominoes.  There are two differences.  First, each domino in the line (i.e. each problem that brings us closer to substance use) gets a little bit bigger and heavier until the last domino in the sequence is ten feet tall, four feet wide, and a foot thick.  As this 10,000 pound domino begins to fall on us, it is too heavy for us to handle alone.  The second difference is that the dominoes circle around behind us.  So when the last domino falls, it hits us from behind when we’re not looking 🙂 ( i am sure anurag would smile to that definition )


just like the above excerpt from the actual conversation, my dear friend was always insightful on almost all the topics that were discussed and observed in his company.I on the same lines observed ( on my own) that none of the smokers or sufferers to addiction ever encouraged me to take up smoking and always despised the credulous idea of its coolness quotient that some teenager might associate with its taking up, out of his naiveté.


Fact –

“Smoking tobacco is the ultimate gateway drug that is legally available, and involves mastering a unique method of intake – much more so than alcohol (which has such a significant effect that users need look no further for stimulation). Smokers looking to get ‘high’ will very rarely do so from cigarettes after the initial stages of taking up the habit.”

no smoking pledge : relapse and recovery

no smoking pledge : relapse and recovery

No smoking pledge- 1st anniversary :chapter 1 – welcome to the smokers’ club

( Continuing from the prologue… )

the storyteller

the storyteller

Chapter 1

Welcome to the smokers’ club

I believe in freedom and a personal liberty to choose, whether right or wrong , angelic or demonic. I believe that a man is slave to his choices and a man is also a master to his choices. I believe that gut feelings and physical urges are far superior driving forces to a persons’ decision making process than his intellectual drift and his debates of rights versus wrongs.

How many times have I or you have followed a new years’ resolution or changed ours’ opinion at the end of a debate, rarely. A person is only destined to be, what he chooses to be at all times, and what he chooses to be, defines him completely.

“A single cigarette contains over 4,800 chemicals, 69 of which are known to cause cancer “

September, 2008


It’s a havoc tonight, following will be a day of our term sessionals and for all the unfortunate people in my branch (electrical), nightmares come with great fortunes and lot of hardwork.As  most of the electrical students have given up on the idea of a sincere attempt for tomorrows’ exam, others have already planned their scores out of 10 (paper is for 20 marks),a few like me and awasthi are men on a sacred mission, its like no win situation for us but we drew our scopes to grab whatever comes our way in tomorrows paper, a very positive approach to life but sadly at the nights’ darkest hour. Beggars are not choosers we know, hence preparing for the inevitability, we decide to go down with a fight.

The raw materials are brought to one heap- sessional notes, sessional assignments, important -solved questions, a big green colored book (boylsted  if I am not wrong ) and a small red-brownish covered book to gargle at the eleventh hour to this infinite pool of analog electrical circuits.

The food orders were made, high- pitched hard rock music was set on playlist on the vlc player with an intent to get our skins out to action, the blueprints of the battle were made and captain. Awasthi was first in command as we were to take our turns to study and follow explanations to each other while the other takes a power nap in the meanwhile.

The cigarettes are numbering in  two and are kept neatly tip- toed along the laptops’ edge. The chapter isn’t getting over as the time of food order is approaching and like often, the delivery boy is again not carrying classics,therefore, a visit to timmi anna ( a night shop esp. a popular Smokers’ convention ) is must at two in the morning.

with enough tussel – of our mind, guilt and brain, we decide to take a break and We carry out notes along the way and read with a cursory reading for self-satisfaction. There would follow a plate full of Maggie, few smokes, needless to say will not be counted,  its unethical to count our nights’ savior- as the time, functional intelligence and effectivity are need of this moment and without a sudden rush of nicotine through the lungs, things will seem “de tour” on our course to conquest.

Whats’ your guess?

Its probably six cigarettes to each atleast , its one of the six exams to be followed in the week and the end result of any of those in particular is not even a double digit score, cumulatively!

what I tried to describe above is one classic situation of an engineering college hostels’ pre-exam trauma  and my fellow mates would be nodding their heads in appreciation to the cool quotients brought out in the attempted screenplay and probably won’t even bother attending to the just theme, that am trying to draw in effect.

If we cut short from the timmi anna trip and i take you on a demo tour to my hostels’ galla-ways (dramaticed gallery ), you can find a smoker in every three doorstep. However, it is not entirely right to classify but for the readers’ distinction, I would say that there may be someone whose smoking to subside the tension of the exams, or someone is having a vociferous argument on the phone with his girlfriend, a group maybe playing poker or teenpatti in a corner room uncaring towards tomorrows’ schedule and with a moral boosting flow of classic Indian abuses to support their joie de vivre. Someone may smoke quietly in his room, while others pace in the corridors with an outcry need by their body language.

A pack of smokes, a handful of smokes, an astray full or probably one last drag before sleeping,a last half left for the early mornings’ rush. Some smoke to the dying buds, some take an odd drag every ninety seconds, few have passionately develop it a skill and performing arts ; smoke rings, nose- back, waterfall  etc etc. while some are unlearning to smoke through mouth ,others are inveterate smokers and most of them don’t really bother if they can’t recall if it was congenital or ever had a definite commencement date in their life.

A certainty of burned lips, burned lungs, an external locus of identity formed well to hide the inability of dealing with things or having a complete lack of soul strength. Whatever is your reason, a misplaced sense of blood rush to your brain, a souls movement upwards to its higher meridian, an emotional reaction of a mans’ silent outcry ,which maybe or maybe not appropriate to his emotional or psychological need of the moment, a feeling of insecurity, a feeling of self -pitty, or a self- punishable act to deter ones’ own actions and despise them with the following lit of  their last smoke of the day,as promised to a loved one or to oneself.

If your are smoking it or smoking up stuff, the above describes it quite fairly and everyone in this corridor knows it will take you down, it will burn your lungs, it will burn your life, but you will do it again and again and again, like a master to your will, like a slave to your own will ,like the physical urges, way beyond the reach of minds’ control over body or the intellects’ feedback over what is right or wrong or some nonsense statistics about smokers or smoking . if anything in the above makes you non-repulsive towards the need to smoke, you may well be ahead of your  schedule to enter here, enter such a corridor someday! just like me, with a warm welcome to the smokers’ club.

no smoking pledge : welcome to the smokers' club

no smoking pledge : welcome to the smokers’ club